flight

Lunacy. My pearl in the sky brings wild excite. A sun is setting somewhere, or might be about to rise on those who dye their eyes when desire tries. With this night sky sweetly kissed orange by lovers and children, I sit silent while smiles drive my cheeks live. This wind is laced with salted sea water and swirls through the city up to the mountains. She brings back fresh springs and flowers mad with beauty- a madness to real for most- they must live in forests, atop mountains to keep from being ruined. And there is a blue man and a green woman staring at me from the insides of an abode I do not know, and suspect I cannot understand their trials. Perhaps. It's of things I have thought lately- somewhere tucked inside my rolling mind- recognizing lips chapped and chewed raw by cold winters past- tucked between cracks of what has been left of moist flesh and dead skin lies the drought of a loveless life. That's where the chill of past snows just bare of a memory are now. Like the seats that surround this table- empty- or occupied by thoughts that teem from my mind- ride the rising pulse perpetuating my existence and excitement. From my minds eye, I always am sitting on wings of magic I do not care to comprehend. Some magic is meant to be eaten, M&M's are meant for this fait. All good things are circles and in the chaotic mess this world has become -undulating like a cat stretching paws forward through tail taught- I organize M&M's into revolving color systems, each orb purely made only of emotion intentionally costumed as childlike chocolate toys meant for the indulgence of anything. I pop a yellow one and I am lucid like a langostein linking ligaments to sea floor. And I see colors where they should not be. Is it because I have gone through space and time nourished only by the beating wings of flighted dragons fried in brown rivers of stars? That can't be so- there is only adventure in the movement of minutia, the stagnence of stoic-how doors are contrived because they live inside and close curious paths of energy that could leap from the depths of the earth to infinitiy - if only doors never closed. If doors never closed they would never open I suppose. Thats why I sit outside, my side, with my ears occupied- with melodies to match emotion and sunset.. prepare for moons shine. What happens next is no quiet matter. Like that child wailing- filled with confusion and misplacement- how brash and obnoxious it would be to lurk in silence in the magesty that is this moment. " This IS terrifying, little one." I say inside. They were here first, before, again. And they have taken over insensitivity and still life. But mine, my life is alive. And, in tandem, the suns warmth and moons calm take ME in. I know where I've been all this time. I make up my minds side, but I'd lie to say my heart isn't my true guide. Lift, look at the way you turn my night to day. And I smile, had I not followed my mind after desperatley following my heart- I would have been upside down right now. My heart harnessing the chaos that is how dark leads to light, how love leads to heart halted for it has nowhere to go but where it cant. This beast that bears me at least lets me write tonight through cold foggy fingers and makes me know I will go to where I know I'll be, slip sliding down the rays of a blistering sun to wherever I am needed most. At this, and every moment we move towards up. He showed me that. There is no end to up- there are only heights so great they give way to the fear of depths. Im swinging out my open window on the wings of today- thinking how I am living in someone else's yesterday and that there are those living in my tomorrows. That version of me who lives in yesterday is on her way somewhere, and I too. There are endless versions of the self I suppose- of the paths carved, of mountaintops explored. Im fighting with the sun, that inferno of energy that gives me vitamins from the air- Its not cheap that it gives me heat to run wildly towards her seems like the only rational thing to do. And I rock with that, and it makes me speed and jump into the air as though I can fly straight up towards that bitch of the sun and crash into her and assume her awesomeness in its entirity. But I for sake of life- I will consume an orange M&M in her stead. I will hold it up in front of her light too bright and pretend I am eating her baby. And on my way back down I will fly with a spoon extended so I can taste sky, medium to rare, or drink in dusty clouds and drown my belly in the sanity that is chaos. And by the time I hit ground I will be midst stars I can see whom have already died. So I will soar on sleep and land on one leg more balanced than I was on two, stand sturdy with my arms outstretched to catch gusts of wind gone gravely mad over lights on night under the nights of light, no sleep this night- to much fright of delight. Calm with so much to smile about I have one corner of my mouth lifted by this adventure and the other is held high pulled round the world- which makes my smile absurd- but he holds it tight, especially this night- until he can touch the smile he gives me with his, we hold onto the smiles we have found dancing as midgets lifted between and by the moons great shine.